When you know the enemy is spawn-peeking but not sure from where, Doc Blanky can find them in an instant. With an average attacker life expectancy of -0.0014 seconds, he holds the world record for shortest distance traveled before dying in a round. He's played a role in some of the most insane headshots ever recorded, exclusively as the receiving party. If you need a teammate to man the drones for literally the entire round, look no further than Doc Blanky.

The WeebLord himself, Keyblade brings utility and functionality to the team... Half of the time. A solid attacker and defender, he brings balance, skill, and knowledge. He can coordinate pushes, flanks, and maneuver-under-fire with ease, but his ability to actually do anything productive with those moves is limited by luck. He is either firing on all 12™ cylinders, or has left the engine on the floor on the garage. There is no in-between. He is familiar with both the very top, and very bottom of the leader-boards, but provides a well rounded experience as you are inevitably dragged slowly down the ELO ranks.

This man has spent more time lying down than The Bride from Kill Bill. Jackwagon has a special talent for placing Maestro cams and then running away to hide and flame both teammates and opponents for the entire round. He has perfected the art of waiting until the enemy plants to then make his move: a slow push from the opposite end of the map, just to get blown away as he enters site with 2 seconds to defuse. If you need a lesson in how to flame through chat while avoiding censors, his MasterClass© starts next Monday.

A true master of the Ash rush, Berserker is your go to player when it comes to entry. That's it. That's all he does. Good for one and only one soft wall breach, this man is like a claustrophobic Sanic: the epitome of speed but can't go indoors. He's breached the building in the blink of an eye, and dead before his rear foot makes it through the threshold, every time. He has actually never seen the inside of some maps as an attacker. He and Doc Blanky (A father son Duo) are always fighting for drone viewing supremacy, but since Berserker actually has map knowledge, his call-outs are infinitely more valuable than Doc's, whose average message is "There's someone by a vase, i don't know what floor, probably 4th floor." Everyone knows there never is or was a 4th floor, except Doc Blanky.

The King of playing the objective, nothing else exists to Stockade. There are parts of maps the man doesn't even know exist because they're too far from any bomb site. A true master of map awareness (in areas near a site of course), Stockade knows everything. He has watched every get_flanked, CoconutBrah, and PacManDownUnder video ever created. His callouts are god-tier. If you ever wondered what air traffic control at Chicago O'Hare sounds like during Christmas, join his discord. It is rumored that he is a pacifist, and possibly a vegan™, which could explain why he has earned MVP several times with the fewest kills, scoring almost all points through assists, plants, and spotting. The man delivers as much as the Post Office, but leaves the fragging for the plebs who can only score points through murder.

With the art of Bottom Fragging built into his DNA, there is no person on the planet better suited for making you look good. While you flaunt around the map doing whatever you please, Spyder will be making his way to the objective, calling out targets, and getting blown away. He has been in more firefights than the entire Australian fire department, but still has the mechanical skills of a toddler in a straight jacket. Seeing him as an opponent during an engagement, the enemy can rest easy knowing they're essentially fighting John Wick, except he has cerebral palsy, a bowl of cold Miso Soup® for a weapon, and is unconscious. With Spyder as your competition on the team leader boards, you can rest easy knowing that you have an ace in the hole keeping you from the bottom spot, except that ace is more like a used piece of gum from a person with Coronavirus.